Being modest is to please others rather than please oneself. A man who values the people around is more modest than one who values himself. A society, that attaches too much importance to modesty, therefore, is more hypocritical. When praised, one, who goes in such a society, should respond in a modest manner instead of saying “thank you!” to accept the compliment. Thus sincerity becomes unacceptable and pretending to be polite is popular.
One chooses to be modest out of different purposes, of which the most important one is not to offend others who can decide his promotion or fortune because they are in power or in a higher social position or they are in possession of a big fortune,as a result, he may bestow a little on the modest one.
The first principle to be a Chinese man is to be modest. “夾起尾巴做人（tuck one’s tail between one’s legs to behave oneself）” is a golden rule to smooth over interpersonal relationships because it makes others comfortable and safe, letting them feel that they are important.
Xu Yuanchong, a famous professor in the field of translation, who printed a line “ the only one to translate Chinese poems into English and French” was violently attacked for his personality of having no modesty although he is just telling a truth as a second man couldn’t be found in the field of translation who made an equivalent achievement. It is not his achievements that caused the attack but his immodesty that caused dissatisfaction. It is not wrong for him to translate so many poems from Chinese into English and French; it is not wrong for him to make such great achievement in translation, but it is wrong for him to tell the truth that he has made such great achievement in translation himself. If he had expressed his pride in his achievement in the form of modesty, he would not have been attacked. It’s a typical case in China.
Many people are proficient in the way of being modest and they are popular with the men who are in power and in higher social position. They really can make those in power or in higher social position feel important and comfortable. That’s why those people catch every chance to teach the golden rule to those inferior to them. “Be modest, young man!” they over and over again warn them and they feel that’s for the young men’ sake. They are right when they are teaching young men a lesson but they are really doing so for the sake of themselves, to tell the truth.
I don’t like those who are arrogant and conceited, yet I don’t like those who are pretending to be modest so that they can please people around him to take advantage of modesty. I hate it when people who behave to be modest but in fact he is conceited because he is too hypocritical. I would rather see that you are show off sincerely than see that you are pretending to be modest.
Modesty is considered virtuous as this society needs hypocrisy to run, in which one should at any moment watch his language and behavior without freedom to express himself or relieve his true nature or flutter his wings of soul. Suppressing himself to please others is his golden law, till on his deathbed he bitterly and sadly said to himself: I came to this world but I have never lived, for I have never been myself for the whole life.
